ATI TEAS (Test of Essential Academic Skills) Version 7English and Language UsageHard
A medical professional is writing a patient's discharge summary. The summary reads: 'The patient was discharged today, having shown significant improvement in their condition. They will be followed up by their primary care physician in two weeks.' Which of the following is the most effective way to improve the conciseness of the sentence?
- AThe patient, showing significant improvement, was discharged today and will be followed up by their primary care physician in two weeks.
- BThe patient was discharged today, showing significant improvement, and will be followed up by their PCP in two weeks.
- CToday, the patient was discharged, having shown significant improvement in their condition, with follow-up by their PCP in two weeks.
- DDischarged today, the patient improved significantly and will be followed up by their PCP in two weeks.
Show answer & explanationAnswer & explanation
Correct answer: D. Discharged today, the patient improved significantly and will be followed up by their PCP in two weeks.
Option B is the most concise because it reorganizes the sentence to eliminate redundant words and phrases while retaining all essential information. It uses an introductory participial phrase ('Discharged today') and combines the two main clauses effectively.
Why the other options are wrong
- A. This option places 'showing significant improvement' as an interrupting phrase, which is less concise than an introductory phrase and still uses 'and will be followed up'.
- B. This option is better but still uses 'and' and 'will be followed up by their PCP' which can be streamlined.
- C. This option adds 'Today,' which is redundant with 'discharged today,' and 'with follow-up by their PCP' is less direct than the active or passive construction used in B.
Conciseness in Writing
Expressing ideas clearly and effectively in the fewest possible words, avoiding redundancy and unnecessary complexity.
- Improves clarity and readability.
- Saves time for the reader (especially important in healthcare).
- Achieved by eliminating wordy phrases, passive voice, and redundant information.
Memory trick: Say it simply, say it clearly, save time for the reader.